... and my wife thinks it's funny.

I will keep this post short as it requires very little explanation.

Mother buys underwear in a roll from Wal-mart.
Gets them home unrolls them. Doesn't like them.

My wife takes them... AND IS WEARING THEM!

I am NOT ok with this. Sure my mother never wore them, But she did own them.

Saturday evening my wife and I called some friends following a week long excursion working the county fair. Although we were a bit tired from working late each evening and a tad sluggish from all the corn dogs and funnel cakes, we were excited about spending time with our friends.
Upon calling them we found that they were out in the hills just outside of town shooting. I'll admit I was a bit excited at this point, knowing my friend had recently purchased an AR-15. You can see a picture of one above. For those of you unfamiliar with this weapon, it is the quintessential assault rifle for home defense, or in our case defending the outskirts of our small town from watermelons that had somehow infiltrated our security. Town residents can sleep well at night knowing that there were 4 of us on the case. We were armed to the teeth with a semi-automatic .22 hand gun, .22 rifle, 20 gauge shotgun, .40 caliber handgun and of course the AR-15. The assault rifle made light work of the invaders. This weapon has only a slight recoil, but the compression is amazing. Standing 10 feet away I could feel the air compression from the explosion of the rounds.

It was a fun evening. I had always wanted to shoot one of these guns. Imagine we shot all those rounds and not a single liquor store was held up, and no one was killed. Weird.

Racism.... Yee Haw!

This past weekend my wife and I held another fundraiser to help us gather the 30 thousand dollars we'll need to adopt a pair of kids from Ethiopia. It was a garage sale held at our church. On Friday evening we brought our goodies for the sale. My mother also came along with a number of great garage sale items including a small portion of her magnificent doll collection. (I was a little sad to see her selling these, but I also knew she would rather ad her 7th and 8th grand kids to the foll than continue to look at dolls gathering dust). Then suddenly trailers began arriving from parishioners, loaded down with items to donate to our sale.

I will say I hate garage sales, no really, I hate them. This on the other hand looked more like a swap meet. I believe I counted 6 televisions and 4 stereos. There were 2 dining tables, 1 couch, 3 recliners, 2 complete dish sets, and hoards of other pieces of merchandises strategically marked down to garage sale prices, including a small increase to create the necessary room for bartering.

It was about 4 hours into the sale which opened at 6 am when I met an old codger we'll just call Hank. Hank approached us with a rack of some kind in one hand and a shiny new quarter in the other, Hoping I'm sure to work us off our 50 cent price tag.

Hank was wearing a US Navy Ball cap. I instantly thought I'd like this old guy. Then he asked why we were holding this sale. Promptly my mother holds up the donation can and explains that we are raising money to adopt from Ethiopia.

Immediately I see the old mans nose begin to curl.Perhaps I was wrong about liking this guy. Then from his mouth comes a word that sounded as though it had come from somewhere deep in his bowls. "You mean there gonna be "BLIICCK"." I think he meant black. After wiping the old man's spittle from my eye, I attempted to explain to him the orphan situation in Ethiopia. My attempt was for naught as he immediately interrupted me to launch into his tirade about having worked in law enforcement in the south. Where he had apparently "locked up" many-a-bliicck.

I've come to some of this with our interracial adoption, and the potential response from the ignorant, but experiencing it first hand was new.

All said it was a great yard sale. We raised over $1300. It was definitely more than I had anticipated. Tainted only by one old ignorant hack.

It was a good day.

Life Minus Men

Apparently a world with out men is closer than you think. Scientists have now created human sperm from stem cells. Of course this brings up the concept of life without men. As the sperm can be created from any stem cell, including that of women. You could literally have a child with only a mother. This prospect doesn't scare me. Even if women are able to somehow wipe out men, they will always keep a few around. Likely in a warehouse somewhere, or maybe each woman would have one in the closet. Men would be something along the lines of a vacuum, coffee maker, or other appliance. Women would pull out the man on occasion for specific purposes such as changing the oil in their car, killing a spider, and opening difficult pickle jars. Don't worry men you'll still have a place in this world.

4th of July Hawaii Vacation

Would you be willing to take your 4th of July holiday in Hawaii if it were totally free? Of course I ask the question because N. Korea is threatening to launch a nuclear weapons test in the direction of our Hawaiian islands. Well, I don't think I would take my family, but if I were a single guy I think my answer would be yes. While I'm not willing to take a chance with my family, I am quite certain that all N. Korea is doing is rattling it's sabres.
Imagine the consequences of launching a nuclear weapon on Hawaii. First we intercept the rocket with our own missile defenses, then we proceed to wipe the diaper wearing midget off the map. Oh... wait. That is what Bush would have done. Obama will go to the United Nations and get a resolution declaring N. Korea bad... bad rogue nation. On the other hand I think I'll stay home for the holiday. Have a great Independence Day.

If I had Voted for Barack Obama

I can only assume people voted for Barack Obama because they agree with his policy statements. So, if I had voted for President Obama, would I be happy with his performance to this point?

Obama Policy: Pull out the troops from Iraq. Keep them in Afghanistan.
Result: Well, I'm not exactly happy. Obama kept the EXACT time table set forth by Bush. But what else could he do. The war in Iraq was all but over, and the pull out would have been very difficult to have pulled off any sooner. There is now a major thrust in Afghanistan. Just where President Obama said we should be.

Obama Policy: Ensure every American has health care insurance.
Result: He is certainly pushing for it. I'm happy that possibly by next year I will no longer pay for health care what so ever.

Obama Policy: Improve diplomatic relations through talk as opposed to force.
Result: This is certainly what he is trying to do, thought it seems he is alienating some of our closest allies (the Brits, Israel) in an effort to be nice to Iran, Venezuela and others. This is what he said he would do. I'd like it if he could do this without upsetting our long time friends.

Obama Policy: Force "green energy on the public.
Result: While there have been some rumblings about this on a large scale cap and trade doesn't seem to be close to a reality yet. There are vouchers to buy greener cars. That is a step in the right direction. I'd still like to see Obama push to rid the world of coal fire power plants.

Obama Policy: Set up a system that rids us of the old model of "bubble and burst".
Result: Giving money to those troubled companies, and setting up government programs to ensure they are run properly in the future. Using tools like, pay czar, car czar x2. Economy seems to be getting better. Credit goes to Obama.

I guess if I'm an Obama supporter I have to be happy with his performance. I would have to say that as far as campaign promises go, Obama seems to be more serious about keeping them than most presidents. Or perhaps he just has the majorities to get it done.